Thursday, 28 July 2011

Look who's talking ?!

When im hungry, like very very hungry, since I'm always hungry 'cuz I practically starve myself and no, to not loose weight, I swear to you I could really 'use' a pound or two, maybe even 20. yea. so when im reallyyyy hungry, I kid myself. I make believe that I'm this humongous ogre who could possibly eat the whole of Africa and still have a portion or two of the south. Seriously! I make ginormous amounts of food portions that in practicaltiy could be finished by ten of me and then I start eating, I hog and hog and guess what doesnt come as a surprise, I have to throw most of it out. 


Like today, I was on this clean India mission, wait what? Everything starts from the confines of your own home right? geez! anyway, so here's why i never clean. I have the clean bug like when I have piles of stuff around I can still manage but when i strat cleaning up I want every moeffin dust particle to know they knocked the wrong window. ;[
I HATE DUSTING man but I just I duno noone cleans precisely how you'd like so every now and then (read maybe twice a year) i wear my 'cleanbee' throne and I clean like it's going outta style. lol. I swear! So when I was done with all the stuff I'd planned for today, I rushed to the kitchen to make some burgers. Vegetarian, yea. Shove it, carnivores. All you are about is flesh and bones so yeaa let me save the planet and we're good. ;[


And I gathered all the stuff I needed and I made 4 giant ones. And since I have confessed to being this lamesass perfectionist, when I was done, I cleaned out the kitchen, filled all the water bottles, gave David his water and biscuits and switched on the laptop/wi-fi thing, washed my hands (yea all this when I'm starving and can eat the African Continent shit yea) , I remove the sheets, jump on the bed, put on tvduck and have my first bite and THAT feeling crawled up again. IM never going to finish this whole thing. Who was I kidding? 4 burgers? :(


1 down. : /


2 down. : |


Okay I'm three down now but theres still one more to go. Damn I feel like im on the episode of man v/s food lmao and I can never make it. okay pray! yes.
Lord. The Almighty. The Food Provider. The Burger Inventor, I call upon thee to bestow me with all the hunger of Africa and all the sensibilty of the american fat-trade so I can finish this last burger and I dont have to waste such nice cheese and feel guilty about the famine stricken part of the world. Amen.






ZOMG. MY PRAYERS ARE ANSWEWRED.
guess who just showed up! mother of all trades. uhm that didn't come out quite right. uhm uhm the divine nurturer, provider, giver, the only, my only reason to have what I have of the feminine side, 'the mother'.
And I popped the question, would you like a perfect portion of burger with your favourite cheese, sauteed.... and she stops the dramatic theatrical desciption, could pass for soliloquy, and she takes-it!
DAYUM!
Im happy as a bud. Yaeyy yaeyy. Ah now I can sleep nice. Thankyou God, for letting me jump the bridge on the hypocrisy trip I preach the world about, yea! Nailed it. Now I can still do that. Ha-ha. Lalalalalaaalaa
So Im gna go dance now.





Oorrrr.. maybe sleep. XD


Peaceout, biaatches!

2 comments:

  1. so this is you ;)

    maybe not the whole of africa, but you could try the whole of europe :P

    ReplyDelete